Regina George and Fat Girls

Globally, the statistic of women that would call themselves beautiful is 4 percent. 

-Jes Baker, Things No ONe Will Tell Fat Girls

I have been a photographer for a long time, and almost exclusively photographing women for the last five or so of those years - and gosh do I get it. We are afraid that calling ourselves beautiful is vain, or even inaccurate. 

As a huge fan of the movie Mean Girls, I recall a part of the flick where main character Cady is seen in front of a mirror with her new friends Regina, Karen, and Gretchen, and all of the girls methodically pick themselves apart in the mirror. “My hips are huge” “I hate my calves” “I’ve got man shoulders” “My hairline is so weird” “My pores are huge” “My nailbeds suck.” Cady thinks to herself “I used to think there was just fat and skinny. Apparently there’s a lot of things that can be wrong on your body.” Then her new friends turn to her, expecting Cady to criticize something about herself too. These little digs go from funny to downright MEAN - to and we do it to ourselves every day too.

Earlier today, I was browsing a Facebook group where a woman was anonymously lamenting why her husband doesn’t seem to be attracted to her anymore. She wrote that she has gained over 100 pounds since meeting him and said that she is fat. The very first comment said “You’re not fat, you’re beautiful!” And I want to dissect that statement a little.

First - beautiful and fat are not mutually exclusive. YOU CAN BE BOTH - and I am 100% confident this anonymous poster totally is! 

Second - fat is not a dirty word. We ALL have fat. Some more, some less, and in different places on our body. How beautiful is THAT?! Like snowflakes - every one of us is different, but every one beautiful!

And third - we have created a society that idealizes a certain body type, and in doing so we have convinced the other 96% of the population that our body type is unacceptable.

I choose to do this important work every day - to show women their beauty. To show you that your body is worth celebrating and you don’t need to - nor should you - be critical nor metaphorically pick it apart. Be kind to yourself. You are worth doing the photoshoot.

All Bodies Beach Party!!!

If you missed the party last week, you REALLY missed out! Last week was our second annual “ALL BODIES ARE BEACH BODIES” party at Lake Red Rock in Pella Iowa! Last year was SO FUN, we decided to do it again - and it was an ABSOLUTE BLAST!!!

If you’re on our email list (and you totally should be!) you’ve probably already read all of these awesome reasons why all bodies belong at the beach and why I think it’s so important to do this as an annual event:

Your body is amazing. It allows you to do incredible things, like walk, run, dance, and hug. It's strong and resilient, and it's been with you through thick and thin. No matter what size or shape it is, it deserves to be celebrated.

1. The beach is for everyone. It's a place to relax, have fun, and enjoy the sun and sand. Everyone should feel welcome and comfortable at the beach, regardless of their body.

   I see this a lot - that we think certain spaces are reserved for other people. I saw a Facebook post in a local mom’s group recently. It was from a mom whose body had changed and she was feeling self conscious - to the point she was going to avoid the beach because she didn’t want to make *other people* uncomfortable. That broke my heart and reminded me how important this work is - and how important this particular event is.

2. Body positivity is important. Our society puts a lot of emphasis on having the perfect body, but this can lead to negative body image and self-esteem issues. Body positivity is about celebrating all body types and sizes, and it's important for everyone to feel good about ourselves, no matter what we look like. That pressure comes from lots of places: advertising, magazines, social media, Hollywood, and even our loved ones. We see filtered and Photoshopped images everywhere and internalize those as our beauty standards.
   
   I think many women would be surprised to know the insecurities I hear in my studio. I hear a lot of women who are insecure about their weight and its distribution; but I also have many women tell me they don’t think boudoir is for them because they aren’t curvy *enough.* We tell ourselves that we have all these “undesireable” traits, but gosh - every single one of the women who have told me these insecurities has been utterly stunning. 

   I need to add here: I think it’s possible for the body positive movement to swing the other way, and in some cases I think it has. I have had women who are very fit or super thin ask if they are welcome at the beach party. YESSSSS!!! This party is for ALL bodies.

3. You're not alone. There are millions of people out there who feel insecure about their bodies, but you're not alone. There are many communities and organizations that support body positivity (ahem - including ours over on Facebook), and there are people who will love and accept you for who you are.

   We ladies have a reputation of doing things together, all the way to leaving for the bathroom. We have an unspoken sisterhood and if we are going to do something hard, let’s do it TOGETHER. 

4. You deserve to enjoy yourself. The beach is a place to have fun and let loose. Don't let your body hold you back from enjoying yourself. Put on your swimsuit and go for a swim, build a sandcastle, or just relax in the sun. You deserve to enjoy every moment.

   It’s OK - encouraged in fact - to have some fun! 
   
   

I thought I would also add some tips to help you feel more confident at the beach too:

• Wear a swimsuit that you feel comfortable in. As miserable as it is to try them on, make sure you do to find a really great fit.

• Find a spot where you feel like you can relax and be yourself.

• Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself 

• Focus on the positive aspects of your body.

• Remember that you're not alone and that everyone has insecurities about their body.

The most important thing is to remember that you are beautiful and worthy of love and acceptance, no matter what your body looks like.

Samantha’s “Death to My Youth” Photo Shoot

When Samantha talked to me about doing a “Death to My Youth” photoshoot, I was pretty unsure - especially when she sent me some inspiration photos in a graveyard. I’m spooked pretty easily and I had visions of being haunted by a ghost who was upset about us doing a photoshoot there.

Buuuuut…Samantha has been one of my most loyal followers and clients. Her Death to My Youth shoot was her fourth boudoir photo shoot. I know her amazing personality and I knew this had the possibility to be epic. I was so flattered that she asked me to do this special set for her that I just HAD to do it.

I let Samantha know I was in and I went to work to find a good spot for a shoot. We wanted an older cemetery, with a lot of character. I drove around the Pella area for hours and finally found this small Civil War cemetery in the area. I was GIDDY to find a place that fit our look.

Finally on shoot day, Samantha came to the Pella Boudoir studio for hair and makeup, then we headed to the cemetery with our props for her shoot!

Her shoot was absolutely AMAZING and had exactly the look we were going for! I loved the way the black angel wings fit the mood, and the balloons were such a fun touch!

A few people have asked if I would do it again. I’m still a really big chicken so my answer to that is that it’d take a very special person - such as Samantha - for me to consider doing it again.

Lexy’s Anniversary Gift

Last year, I had the privilege of photographing Zach and Lexy’s gorgeous wedding. Fast forward, and Lexy booked her boudoir shoot ahead of their anniversary so she would have something beautiful to give Zach for their first anniversary. The first anniversary is the “paper anniversary” - making boudoir photos the perfect gift!

Lexy came all the way to Pella from a few hours away, even spending the night with a friend so she would be ready for her morning shoot. She was pampered with hair and makeup, then we had an incredible photo shoot. Take a look below at what she thought of the experience - and see what Zach thought too!

Photographer Recognized by Professional Photographers of America

It’s been a long time since I have blogged, but I really wanted to share this one - especially because today is my 10th anniversary as a full-time professional photographer!

A little over a year ago, I started the process to become a Certified Professional Photographer. That process is a rigorous process that involves two things: (1) passing a written exam and (2) passing an image submission.

I passed the written component without issues - though I will admit that the exam was VERY difficult. Then I moved on to the image submission, where I was given a set of objects that I had to photograph in three very specific ways.

I submitted my images, but unfortunately only one of the three passed. Two months later I tried again, and I passed!

Now, I can use “Certified Professional Photographer” after my name, AND the Professional Photographers of America did this profile about me! And just for fun, I’ll share my 3 photos below.